MEN are Samurai Mystics : Being a Man in 2021


by Hugh Wilson

There are so many profound changes happening, across our world, in our workplace and in our home.   Today, we have one world economy, a pandemic causing unbearable human suffering, increasing inequality, an environment in turmoil, and a very uncertain future.   In addition, we are intimately connected by the internet and social media, bringing events of every kind, from all over the world, instantly, into our day to day lives. 

One profoundly important change that is gathering pace throughout the World, is the MeToo Movement.  This is like an earthquake, for all Men, in every culture.   Women are taking powerful men to court, challenging their habitual, abusive ways of relating to Women, and sending them to jail.

 Without doubt, for all of us, the most important change required today, in all cultures, is for Men to wake up, to respect, protect, support, and treat as equals, Women, in every society, and in every area of society.

This is an enormous challenge for Men, who have been in control for generations.  Every aspect of Male behaviour towards Women, that has been tolerated for hundreds of years, must be reassessed today.

We see every day, in the papers, and on our screens, disrespectful and violent, sexual interactions, carried out by Men towards Women.  This is happening in our homes, schools, in the cities and the suburbs, and even in our own Houses of Parliament.  

Important discussions are beginning about “what is sexual consent” mainly amongst the Women and their Daughters.  This is the urgent question every Man and their Sons must reflect on, including the attitudes, language, and deeply imbedded sexism that has been handed down from generation to generation.

Men are born of Women.  Women are Men’s Mothers.  Women are Men’s Sisters.  Women are Men’s Daughters.  The love and respect for women is there with most men.   However, today it has been distorted with the heightened, invasive, and unpredictable sexual energy, that pornography, and social media have brought into all our lives.

In the fifties and sixties, human sexuality, was liberated from the Victorian morality, judgement, and guilt of the past.   Sexual diversity is at last accepted by most societies across the world.   This wonderful new freedom, unfortunately, has been taken by Men, to obscene extremes.

The abuse of children, sexual exploitation and slavery, sex trafficking, video games depicting violence towards women, and a billion-dollar pornography business.  This is shocking, disappointing, and very confronting, for Men in all cultures.    

Our society has become highly sexualized, at the cost of the natural working partnership between Men and Women, that for all its faults, has worked, and been around for a long time.  It is so important for our children to have intelligent and professional, sexual education at school, particularly the boys and young men, so a new and respectful attitude is promoted, excluding any sexual overtones whatsoever.  We are all people first, and gender second.  Our society is at a critical moment in time, when men and women must come together as equals.  We need mature, compassionate, and intelligent leadership from Men everywhere, to make this happen.   

Women are demanding, and aggressively acting upon, achieving equality with Men.  Women refuse to wait any longer, challenging Men’s previously accepted ways of relating, and challenging male power on all levels of society.   Men have largely excluded women from business, money, church, and sport, up until now.  Divorce was forbidden in mainstream religions, and men in almost every culture, have gone to great length to control a woman’s sexuality.  Men continue to desperately hold onto power, despite the woman’s clear desire to share power and be respected and treated as equals.

Men are struggling to keep up, and until now have refused to be fair, refused to make way, refused to acknowledge the talent, and accept the competition of Women in the workplace.  Men must be willing across the globe, to be honest, about their history of control and repression.   The anger Women are expressing today has built up over generations of domination and abuse. 

Men have almost in every culture, controlled and repressed Women.  It is a horror story how many ways men have kept women subservient and inferior, and controlled their sexuality.  The men have had the jobs, earned the money and the accolades, controlled who gets the jobs, and controlled the national and household finances. 

A woman’s role up until relatively recently, has been limited to caring for the children, cooking, and cleaning, and supporting the man, both sexually and to succeed in his career.  She has never been fairly paid for her services, and as a result, been totally dependent on the man, for the money needed to care for herself, and feed and educate the children.

This drive for change by the Women is threatening Men’s jobs, careers, earning capacity, their role as father / provider / protector, and raising the question, “what is it to be a Man?”

At the core of all this upheaval and reassessment, is the emotional, physical, and sexual differences between a Man and a Woman.  Both are conditioned, from the earliest years, to fit into, and conform, to society’s images, rules, and role models. 

In Western society, Men are depicted as strong and tough, work hard, often intelligent, and creative, competitive, and ambitious. Men are seen to find it difficult to express their feelings, to experience intimacy, to be tender and vulnerable, and to love deeply.

Men tend to have a more superficial attitude to sex than women and are continually searching for orgasm.   Whether it is in the form of money, power, career success, or competition, they can all be seen as orgasm substitutes, or socially accepted attempts to give their life meaning, variety and excitement.  They bring for men in the short term, heightened feelings of aliveness and meaning, but when they ultimately fail, create suffering, and can result in Male anger and violence.  

The identity a Man builds around himself is fragile, and when it inevitably collapses, the emptiness exposed at the core, can result in extreme domestic violence.  Family breakdown is often the trigger.

It is this emotional instability that is inherent to being male, that must be understood, at school, in the workplace, and in the family home.  Men must be shown ways, to remain peaceful in times of personal crisis, comfortable in their emptiness and aloneness, and not resort to violence.   This characteristic emotional instability, common amongst Men, must be discussed and special programs developed, and included in the educational curriculum, across all societies.         

For a man, it only takes one orgasm of many to create life.   Any changes, emotionally or spiritually, are by choice.   If the woman becomes pregnant, even if abortion is the choice, her life is changed forever.

For the woman, pregnancy starts an utterly profound experience and journey, that lasts for a lifetime.  The woman’s body responds, and changes in a thousand ways, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, to accommodate the foetus.  The Woman surrenders her body naturally, to the developing baby, becoming vulnerable, powerful, and radiantly beautiful.  The Woman often experiences unconditional love and surrender, in the birth experience. 

The Man can only watch on, in awe and amazement, at the effort, pain, and strength of the Mother, as she gives birth.  This is an incredible experience for Men as they watch helplessly and relive their own birth. The journey from conception to birth and around six months after, illustrates one of the primary differences between Men and Women.

 Immediately, once born, the baby takes all the attention of the Mother, breasts create milk, sexual desire is gone, and life is centred on keeping baby happy.  The new Father is often not prepared for the changes, feels resentful, frustrated, and in time, recommences his demand and search for orgasm, in any of the above forms, that society supports, and considers normal.  In some societies, prostitution is accepted as necessary to placate the Male search.

The new Father, after the birth of their child, desperately wants to regain his sense of power in the relationship and sets about inventing ways to re-build meaning in his life and regain the attention of the new mother.   The Father wants to satisfy his need for orgasm, and ensure, she is the mother of only his children.  In too many cultures, men have invented cruel ways of suppressing and even ruining women’s sexual pleasure, in order to control them.  Today, in some cultures, Women are prevented from accessing education, punished, and even stoned to death, for challenging the traditions established by the Males in power, controlling their sexuality.  There are cultures who prefer Male offspring and kill Females at birth.

Up until now, throughout the world, Men have set up society’s rules to their own advantage, and generation after generation, used traditions to satisfy the Male’s search for orgasm, power, success, and ultimately meaning in their existence.

Men have for far too long, held onto power and resisted change. 

Enough is enough!

It has been over 100 years since Woman’s Liberation became a force for change.  However, Men in power across the world, have resisted their demands, holding onto the old ways and power structures.  By so doing the old Men in power are making a mess of critically important issues threatening the very survival of our species and the world as we know it.

Men continue to embrace war and aggression as solutions to differences.  In a small inter-connected world this approach does not work, and it can be argued it never worked.  History is always in the background of present events, and where there has been war, hatred, and barbaric cruelty in the past, its memory lingers, and influences what happens in the present.

Today needs great understanding and maturity, to heal the past, to forgive, and to creatively work together, despite cultural differences and painful history.  War today is not an option.  Including Women in the decision-making process brings in an important new approach to solving today’s problems.  The new world demands solutions that include all cultures, reduce poverty and suffering, and include a deep respect for Nature and its sacred diversity.   

Men must re-assess, change, and make way for the new Woman.  Men have for far too long, held onto power and resisted change.  It is now the Woman’s turn to rule and claim positions of power in every arena of society.  Women and Men are equal.  They always have been.  It has been the Men who have betrayed them, with their endless search for meaning and power.  Women, absolutely should not, and will not, accept Male domination anymore, claiming their freedom, power, creativity, and equality.

Men today, must grow up and become what I call, Samurai Mystics! Men do not have the natural, instinctive, body experience that give Women their unique inner strength.   Men must acknowledge and embrace, the inherent emptiness at their core, learn ways to give them an inner emotional stability, and by so doing, enhance their natural physical and intellectual strength. 

This is what I call the Samurai Mystic.  A Man who loves action and decision making, is not afraid to be alone, and not afraid to fail and look a fool.  He is at peace in the silence and power of the moment, and knows in his heart, no matter what, he will act from a place of connection, compassion, and creativity.

Then Men and Women together, can engage with the needs of society, expressing fully their respective differences, with respect, compassion, equality, and inner peace.   This is the new education, required for Men to become fully alive, and to participate creatively and equally with the new Woman. Whether we are a Man or Woman, the necessary changes are different, and will demand re-education, support, and open and courageous debate.    

Nothing should or will stop this change. The world needs all our collective creativity to survive the years ahead.  It is time.

Author Hugh Wilson© 2021 – Hugh is an inspirational speaker on the most profound spiritual question “who am I”. He is the inventor of an evolutionary ergonomic office chair range and in a previous life time was a designer of beautiful Eco-sustainable passive solar buildings.


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